Random Ramblings

So you found me eh??? Being back here feels a bit like coming home.....I feel comfortable here.

I don't have much to say, really. I feel like poop most days as my joints ache, burn, swell and become stiff. Putting two feet on the ground in the morning simply takes too much effort and energy at times.

Docs think it's RA (rheumatoid arthritis) and now their out to prove it. I just want medicine to make it better already. Feeling crummy can be down right depressing---especially when the children's laughter echos down the hall and into my bedroom and I am reminded of what my body is keeping me from enjoying.

I am counting the days until I can see my mama and daddy, feel their warm hugs and enjoy that beautiful Michigan breeze. We are ALL going........my hubby and Sultan this time! The kiddo's are beyond thrilled and I'm counting the days til I can wrap my arms around this turkey:

Just look at those baby blues---and to think I haven't held her since she was newly born (insert sad face here). I miss out on so much being here in Arizona, away from my Michiganders. My mom, dad, sis, bro, aunts and friends all do their best to call me often, fill me with updates, throw Peyton on the phone so that I may sing with her---all in an effort to help me feel closer to home. I crave the support of having my mother live close to me, especially these days. I need her more than ever. Countless days I would have called and asked her to come sit with me, talk to me, love on my babies. I would have begged her to get me out of the house and have lunch together, something, just to help me feel human again. Then again, I know I wouldn't have to beg as she is always one step ahead knowing just what I need.

It gets so lonely here in AZ while fighting an illness when all you want is your mom, who just happens to be over 2000 miles away. Melissa, Rebecca.......you two rock! Your support is unyielding and your friendship only grew stronger during difficult times and will never be forgotten.

I don't always have pleasant thoughts to write about, therefore I haven't written. But with the support of my friends and particularly my Aunt Daleann, I will write----even when I feel I have nothing to say that anyone would want to read.

XOXO

Rie